Here are 10 funny quotes to brighten your day:

  1. “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.” – Anonymous

  2. “Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey

  3. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Anonymous

  4. “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright

  5. “I can resist everything except temptation.” – Oscar Wilde

  6. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Anonymous

  7. “The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Steven Wright

  8. “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous

  9. “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright

“I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.” – Rodney Dangerfield

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” ― Frank Zappa
“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”― Mark Twain
“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”― Aristotle
“The very essence of romance is uncertainty.” ― Oscar Wilde

Life Quotes:


11. "Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans." — John Lennon


12. "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." — Robert Frost


13. "The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well." — Ralph Waldo Emerson


14. "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough." — Mae West


15. "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain." — Unknown


Positivity & Motivation:


1. "The only limit to our realization of tomorrow is our doubts of today." — Franklin D. Roosevelt


2. "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts." — Winston Churchill


3. "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream." — C.S. Lewis


4. "Believe you can and you're halfway there." — Theodore Roosevelt


5. "Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going." — Sam Levenson


Love & Friendship:


6. "Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'" — C.S. Lewis


7. "The best thing to hold onto in life is each other." — Audrey Hepburn


- "Love is not about how many days, months, or years you’ve been together. Love is about how much you love each other every day." — Unknown


- "A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." — Walter Winchell

-"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides." — David Viscott